I was speaking with a local nonprofit organisation when the topic of entitlement came up. It’s a word that often carries a negative connotation, especially when discussing the young children of the wealthy. Outsiders and society may look at kids in expensive cars, private schools, or living an otherwise privileged life and cast aspersions.

Before pointing your fingers at the kids, it’s worth asking a deeper question: Who created the conditions that lead to this unbridled privilege in the first place?

By my thinking, as I shared during the conversation, entitled kids aren’t born; they are nurtured.

Most of the time, it isn’t intentional. Parents who have worked hard to build wealth naturally want to give their children a better life than they had. Providing opportunities, comfort and security feel like the ultimate reward for your years of effort. Or those raised among privilege want to ensure the same for the next generation.

Yet when children grow up surrounded by abundance, they may begin to assume that their lifestyle is normal, something that simply exists rather than something that was earned. That’s often where entitlement begins.

Children who have never had to earn money often lack a clear understanding of its value. If a car appears in the driveway on their sixteenth birthday, they may never think about what it cost, how many hours someone had to work to pay for it, or what sacrifices were made along the way. Such questions may never arise when the insurance bill arrives or the gas tank needs filling.

When things are given freely, appreciation can diminish and spending and expectation grow easier and faster.

Ironically and paradoxically, the greatest satisfaction from money for many is not from receiving it, but rather from earning it. Spending money that you worked for carries a deeper sense of pride and responsibility. Kids need to experience this and so that they can have a better understanding of its value.

This doesn’t mean parents should raise their children in deprivation or dramatically lower their standard of living. The goal is balance. Kids can enjoy a comfortable upbringing while still learning that rewards come from effort. The key is creating opportunities for them to experience the connection between work, reward and financial independence.

That education often begins with honest conversations. Parents may need to explain that financial support isn’t unlimited. With adulthood, or even when the child is in grade school, comes responsibility. Simple systems like allowances tied to chores, part-time jobs, saving goals, and budgeting lessons can go a long way toward building healthy financial habits and the awareness of the value of a dollar.

Starting young helps. When children understand early that money must be earned and managed, the lesson becomes part of their mindset, rather than a painful adjustment later in life.

Entitlement isn’t limited to families. It also appears in the workplace. Managers sometimes promote employees or grant raises because they like the individual or fear losing them, rather than because those employees have truly earned the raise or role. That approach can backfire. When someone is elevated before they demonstrate the skills required, the results can include poor leadership, declining morale and high turnover.

Whether at home or at work, the solution is the same: rewards should follow performance and responsibility.

Parents and leaders alike must stay ahead of entitlement by reinforcing a simple principle: opportunity is valuable, but earning it is what gives it meaning. When people understand that connection, they gain something far more valuable than comfort: they gain purpose, accountability, and the confidence that comes from building their own success.

If you’re wondering how to imbue your children, your team, your employees, even yourself, with a spirit of how hard work can replace the expectations and perils of entitlement, let’s talk. I’ve worked with high-net-worth families, family offices, and leadership from Fortune 500 companies to help each understand how to align work and compensation – with no expectation of entitlement.